Grief in the Briefs

What's the best way to bond with a new friend? Is it:

A. Go out for a cup of coffee and discuss similar interests

B. Have them over for dinner and a board game

or

C. Let them put you in an adult diaper while you pretend to be helpless


If you answered A or B, congratulations! You are a normal person! If, however, you answered C, then you are either a nursing student, or need serious help.

Now granted, being put in an adult diaper, or "brief" as we are now to call them - is not exactly dignified. But, as a nursing student, it's something that has to get done. How else will we know how to do the hard work unless we practice?

Fortunately for me, I was working with a girl whom I've become friends with, and letting her show me how to do the whole brief-changing-roll-the-patient thing gave us both a good laugh...and the students working next to us had a good chuckle as well.

So, for all you new nursing students out there, when you are faced with the grief in the briefs, just remember: Your instructor is watching so retain as much information in as short a period of time as you can when doing the briefs and get it over with. Laughing is ok, even encouraged to break the ice a little.

Just please don't laugh when you're changing or cleaning a patient. Because they'll have to send you home or to the psyche ward.

To be, or not to be ticked

Well, all my worrying this week has been for naught.

See, clinicals were supposed to be this Saturday, so I got everything all set up, got my list of things I'll need, got all psyched up and ready to go...aaannnnnnd they cancel them. Why on earth they did is beyond me, but they did, and we have to suck it up for two more weeks.

But, I suppose this has its advantages: Two more free weekends, and tonight Thad and I get to spend much needed time with good friends. And it's two more weeks of practice in the labs, reading, studying, worrying. Ok maybe not that last part; two more weeks to build up some confidence and plan an escape route.

I'm kidding!




Though knowing where all the exits are would be dandy.

The Dreaded First Day of Clinicals - Story of a Grown Woman Being Ridiculous

It's not upon me just yet, but next Saturday, January 22nd, I will step in to some sort of medical facility wearing my white scrubs, my "LPN Student Nurse" patch displayed proudly on my crisp white left sleeve and...

I don't know!

Now, if you know me at all, you'll understand how much "not knowing" drives me crazy. But here's a vivid vision for you to sink your teeth into of how I've imagined it might go:

                                                            ***



The house is cold. Faint thunks are coming from Maddie's room as she bangs her toys against the wall after we've told her a thousand times not to. The soft morning sunlight glows through the window and touches my unopened eyes. I clench my jaw to stifle a morning breath yawn and do one of those full body in-bed stretches.
Ahhh, Saturday morning. Maybe Thad can get up with Maddie today and...
Saturday.
Saturday.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
My eyes pop open in a sickening rush. (Insert profuse use of very naughty words)
I was supposed to be at clinicals at 6:30! It's...I turn to look at the alarm clock, which is flashing as if laughing at me, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, you're late, power out, ha-ha.
I spring out of bed, bawling and yelling at myself, at Thad, at Florida Power and Light. I go to the bathroom and cry. I try to put on my make-up, and cry harder.
Maddie run's in the bedroom, wearing her usual morning attire: bright red tights with a hole in the toe, plastic princess shoes, and a Buzz Lightyear pajama top. "Whas wrong, Mommy? You cryin'?"
After I reassure my poor kid that I'm okay, I dress too quickly, forgetting that my scrubs are white and that blue panties probably weren't the best choice, I grab my stuff and fly to clinicals, pulling in the parking lot and almost running over a nurse who will probably be my boss one day, and a nice looking elderly woman in a wheelchair who doesn't even realize she's outside, let alone in the path of a pshyco student.
I make it in and find a very perturbed Instructor who tells me I'm lucky he's not sending me home.
The day proceeds with me making every possible mistake imaginable. Everyone is laughing at me (which is more than likely the blue panties, though I won't find this out until I get home and Thad makes a joke about it).

Walking the path blindly

Sometimes, our paths seems directionless. The way is crowded and we can't see our destination.  My first day of class, I would have these moments when I would think what am I doing here? I'm a writer, not a nurse!

But something inside was telling me it was where I was supposed to be, and it felt right. Do I know if I am going to fail or succeed? No, but if I don't ever try, then I am still no closer to my destination.

Maybe being a nurse will be a part of my real joy. The kind of joy that holds you up from the inside, not the kind that surrounds you.

Similar shades of green

As I was bent double over some unidentifiable sticky substance on my kitchen floor this morning, scrubbing at it with all my heart and saying aloud - though there was no one to hear, "What is this? Really guys? Come on! Why does no one notice this but me?"  I thought of something quite inspiring.

Even though I have no clinical experience, I believe there are a few ways in which mothers and nurses are similar:

• You will come in contact with unidentifiable sticky substances, and when you do, no one will be around to clean it but you. And I definately have this one wrapped up. I am a pro at spot scrubbing all surfaces.

• At some point, you will undoubtedly touch poop. Ok I know this one is gross, but let's face reality. What mother or nurse do you know that hasn't had the poopy horror story? Some of us are lucky and strike out at only one or two incidents, but either way, mother or nurse, you're going to have a crappy day at some point...no pun intended.

• Another person's wellbeing is dependent upon you...but that doesn't stop them from whining. And what do we have to learn? I mean, yes. Sometimes we have breakdowns and need to walk away as mothers (hopefully most of us make sure there is a friend or relative nearby to ensure the safety of our children) but a nurse, I would think, has to master the art of patience, forgiveness, compassion, and understanding to care for someone who is...well...a whiner.

• Seeing your child/patient accomplish things gives you a sense of pride. As a mom, I know that when my daughter does something wrong, the first thing I want to do is blame myself. But on the other hand, when she accomplishes things (pouring her own water, putting her own dishes in the sink, picking up her toys, etc.) that's when I can relax a little and say to myself, See? You're not so bad. Nurses have a huge job of intervening in a patients life to help them become healthy again, or improve the quality of their life. That means teaching them, whether to be self-reliant, or about proper nutrition etc., and when they see their patients accomplish that, it must be a similar feeling to what a mother feels.

• A mother/nurse MUST be organized and reliable. If the checkbook is not balanced properly (which I have done) it screws up your family's life for a short time. If a nurse forgets to chart something, or charts wrong, that could be fatal in some cases. And reliability is essential to the feeling of safety your child/patient has with you.

• Both a mother and a nurse have to be good listeners, be loving, willing to allow the kids/patients to make some decisions, and know when to let go.

It's a short list for now, though I know there are many similarities. And by no means do I intend to say that a patient is like a child. I was simply taking what I do know (parenting) and seeing how it compares to what I don't quite know yet (nursing). Mainly to boost my own confidence, since I've been feeling bad about not having the same experience as the other people in my class.

And while I was writing this, it came to me that the art of nursing can also be compared to the art of marriage.

Perhaps I'll save that for a future post :)

Two rays of sunshine

I passed my first test and  I got the hang of taking BP (blood pressure)! Well, I still need practice, but it was a boost of confidence to know I'm starting off strong.

We had to take a look at the Nurse Practice Act for our state, and Good LORD! It's a statute that seems longer than some of the ridiculously thick books I like to read...and I guess it's a good thing that I do like to read, because it would appear my life will now be overflowing with it.

So, coffee?
Check.

Paper?
Check.

Highlighters?
Check.

Coffee?
Check.

Back-up coffee because God forbid I run out of the central coffee stock?


Check.

Where the Grasshopper Stands

So, this being my first ever real blog, I think I'll start simple.

I'm enrolled in the PN program at my tech center, and as I write this, it is only my second week of school.  I knew I would need a place to channel the rollercoaster of emotions, knowledge, advice I've picked up, and all the other "stuff and things" - as my husband and daughter would say.

This seemed like perfect place.

I realized really quick that I was the only student out of 14 with no experience at all, either as a CNA or someone who works in a medical office. Made me feel inferior for sure, but they all seem pretty laid back, helpful, encouraging. It's not hopeless :)

Book smarts? No problem. Hands on? That's when my nerves get the best of me, and clinicals start next week already! I had trouble trying to figure out how to use a blood pressure cuff yesterday for crying out loud! Ahhh, well. I laugh it off and try to study as hard as I can.

And I keep reminding myself: One day, I will be a great nurse. But right now, I will be a great student.